What I really want to do
Explaining my subheadings. Why I'm on Substack, and the topics I hope to explore.
There is a lot on my mind, every day. This is the stuff that colours the unstated depths of the conversations I have with others, and sets my incorporation of the things I learn. If I don’t dump it out somewhere I’ll —
Micronova
I have a strange conviction. The conviction is, that in the next 10-20 years, the magnetic poles will flip, the Earth will turn sideways, the sun will explosively eject a massive quantity of material, the whole mess will generate an unfathomably massive lighting strike, and humanity will be nearly wiped out. This happens every 12k years, and the elites know it’s coming.
I want see if I can use this Substack to debunk myself.
Not really myself. Ben Davidson. But also myself.
I have found his arguments compelling yet so all-encompassing that I can’t confidently put my finger on exactly why I’m convinced. This sort of theory is not something that a person wants to be wrong about. As a natural skeptic but lifetime lover of apocalyptic, survival, horror and sci-fi stories, I recognize I’ve got an achilles heel here: like Fox Mulder, I want to believe. Not that I want the world to end, but my instinctual teeth want to sink in to a story just like this one, as frightening as it is.
One might say that I ‘know it in my heart,’ but for me, that’s not enough.
I might be suspending disbelief unconsciously, making myself gullible. This is not the first time I’ve felt alarmed by a scientifically-presented theory. Some previous instances turned out to be bunk and/or overblown. Others — like the nefarious intent entwined in obstetrical medicine, and the nefarious motives of the covid scandal — turned out to be right.
Mind
Along with the cataclysmic outlook Davidson presents, comes the more easily-swallowed apparent fact that our planet’s magnetic field is undergoing a disruption. Both magnetic poles are presently accelerating toward a point in the south Indian ocean, opposite the South Atlantic Anomaly, and are on course to meet each other in roughly a decade.
Magnetic field disruptions also disrupt minds. They scramble brains, increase emotional instability, and decrease cognition. This means more conflict, more disconnection from others, and more difficulty coping and learning, for every mind on the planet.
Whatever happens in the coming years, we need to know how to survive our own selves. We need to get better at being here inside ourselves, navigating our impulses, and sublimating/alchemizing our destructive states into constructive states. Our fundamental adaptability needs a shot of nitrous.
I’ve long been fascinated by the nature of mind, so I’d like to have a written learning space where I accumulate and share tools for mental and physical wellbeing.
The best way to utilize an unsure theory is to find the adaptations to it that are good for us regardless of whether the theory is true or false.
Mothers’ Aid
This one is hard. I wish it didn’t have to exist.
My interactions with the medical and legal system in 2019-2020, during my pregnancy and labour and afterward, were hell. I suffered numerous violent assaults. I went to police. I went to sexual assault crisis help. I went to lawyers. I went to court. I was belittled, gaslit and dismissed by people in positions of power, from start to finish, for expecting that my human rights persist during pregnancy and labour, and that assaulting the sexual organs of a woman in labour is sexual assault.
I created a nonprofit, ‘The Mothers’ Aid Society of Canada,’ and started compiling arguments and evidence, aspiring to launch legal action to stop obstetric violence: the criminal abuses labouring women routinely endure in Canadian hospitals. Then the covid scandal began, and I left MASC behind to go to war. About a year later, I found that a large number of my fellow soldiers in the fight for medical consent rights also oppose a woman’s right to end a pregnancy: a woman’s human rights, and medical rights, in pregnancy.
If a woman can’t have a right to end a pregnancy, how can she be the owner of her own womb, her own body? How can she have a right to withhold consent to dehumanizing and violent (and inherently sexual) interventions in her pregnancy? How can she be protected from assault? If she doesn’t own herself, who does?
Predators do. Predators who alienate women from their own pregnancies in the first place, and weaponize babies against their own mothers for financial and personal gain. These are members of the meddling middleman class we call ‘obstetricians.’
My heart has been broken at a few angles. I’m tired and weak. I’m still hurting, especially when I focus on this topic. But the work needs to get done.
Memebusting
Memes are useful for getting an idea across quickly, with contagious wit. But that doesn’t mean the ideas are always correct. Some of them are spread only by feeling, and are either totally unproven, or provably false.
I like debunking stuff. Contagious falsehoods waste our time. Flat Earth is an astroturfed distraction. Moon landing skepticism and chemtrail theories are populated with weak arguments — that is to say, even if you guys are right, you’re not talking about it very comprehensively. So I’ll be pew-pewing my laser at the fake news that pops up in my feeds, as well as the seems-fake-but-turned-out-true news.
I also like to bust the memes of totalitarian ideologies and organized religion. Some religions more than others, because I’m exposed to the bad sides of some more than others. This could get messy, but it’s what I’ve always done.
This is my ‘That is not true’ section. It may evolve into a casual catch-all, but I promise not to make it a dumping ground for lazy pop/meme-culture commentary.
Meditations
I love to draw pencil portraits, and other things, but I haven’t taken drawing seriously in years. I have a long list of people and things to draw, and the clock is ticking. This is not fitting, because for me a drawing session is a meditative zone where there is no time and life is sensation. I just need to start! Tick tick tick.
Makebelieve
I write fiction under the pen name AmyVanHym. I’ve posted some of it to a separate substack. I hope to write more.
It’s hard to get into the right mental state (I wait for creative visions in a sort of trance) because it requires me to detach from conventional reality for a while, and allow my sleep to be disrupted by sudden must-write-now eurekas. But right now, conventional reality is pummeling the hell out of me, and us. I don’t know when I’ll be able to write fiction again, and finish my numerous original projects.
Patterns and symbols are my drug of choice. Over at the Amy substack, I might also write about my explorations in metaphysical whimsy, without the expectation of being believed.